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2024-03-28 03:55:09
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Whole Foods wild out

It’s not much different from theatre, but a lot cheaper and more fun: drive to a local Whole Foods (“Whole Paycheck”) grand opening, savor the drama of two English-as-a-2nd-language customers verbally abusing each other over a parking space (the last of 500 apparently), elbow one’s way into the store, and wonder what the hell the rest of the world eats. It’s like shopping at Neiman Marcus (“Needless Markup”), only for groceries.

A friend of mine expressed a pointed objection to Whole Foods acquiring Wild Oats markets, based on concerns that they might actually try to do the all-American thing: make money (eg by raising prices once Wild Oats stores were closed). Well, the ’ol USA is no longer a free country, but the opportunity to make a buck by pleasing people still exists (sort of), and should not be nixed simply because people love what you offer and gag at the alternatives. And in my book, inducing people to pay for products they like is much more honorable work than carving sub-prime mortgages into tranches.

It’s simple: if you think Whole Foods prices are too high (news flash: quality isn’t free), shop at E Coli Mart or Safeway. If you like the Whole Foods offering, don’t bitch and moan about paying for quality (not just the food, but Whole Experience™ which does not require taking a shower afterwards or worrying about whether the fecal chicken and repackaged seafood are safe to eat). And don’t expect to go to Whole Foods and pay $1.29 for a 5 pound bag of genetically-engineered cereal.


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